They always say you can’t choose your family. However you do get to choose your spouse. Sometimes though that spouse comes with a mother-in-law who is a bit much to deal with. But in essence, you did get to choose her, so I guess that’s your own fault. The need to be nice remains constant, but that doesn’t mean you can’t have a little fun with some passive aggressive gifts for your mother-in-law.

Disclaimer: To any of my own family reading this list, I made it with the mom from “Everybody Loves Raymond” in mind. Not my own. Personally my mother-in-law is great, probably just like yours is (if anyone is reading over your shoulder), right??

1. "Dinner Made Simple" Book

A recipe book is probably a good idea for your mother-in-law. But an easy recipe book implies that maybe she has some trouble in the kitchen without saying as much.

Regular Price: $24.95 Price: $16.96 Buy / View on Amazon.com

2. The Grandparents Handbook

The only thing worse that you could suggest she needs to learn more about in a book than her cooking is her grandparenting. Grandparenting should be easy, just make lots of cookies and spoil them rotten, right? This tells her that she’s doing a poor job at what should be an easy task.

Currently
Unavailableon Amazon.com

3. iRobot Roomba 690 Robot Vacuum

If her house was spotless at all times, she wouldn’t need a Roomba. So getting her a Roomba implies that her house could be cleaner. This is an expensive way to say “Hey, sometimes your house is a little dusty.”

Regular Price: $374.99 Price: $267.84 Buy / View on Amazon.com

4. Elizabeth Taylor Perfume

To me, perfume is always a passive aggressive gift. It doesn’t necessarily tell the person they smell bad, but it definitely tells them they could smell better. Plus Elizabeth Taylor was an old woman who not too long ago passed away (RIP), so while she does still lend her name to some nice perfumes, this definitely does not send the message of “young” or “trendy”.

Price: $15.00 Buy / View on Amazon.com

5. A Wrinkle in Time [Blu-ray]

This one is a little subtle. Tell her it’s a great movie. Tell her the kids loved it. Tell her Oprah’s in it. It doesn’t matter, it will just make her think about her own wrinkles and the unending march of time.

Currently
Unavailableon Amazon.com

6. Anti-Aging Serum

For any anti-aging gift to be considered more than a dig, it’s going to have to be expensive and impressive. This serum may not be cheap, but has a ton of great reviews. The only pitfall on this one is that at the expense of a good passive aggressive gift, it might just work well for her.

Price: $64.00 Buy / View on Amazon.com

7. "Your Child Is a Disappointment" Book

Your spouse isn’t perfect (and neither are you!). But parents don’t like to be reminded of all the failures their kids have accumulated on their way to adulthood. This gift has the bonus of being a passive aggressive shot at your spouse as well, for good measure.

Regular Price: $16.00 Price: $5.09 Buy / View on Amazon.com

8. Adult Cremation Urn

Tell her you thought this vase was gorgeous and would look amazing on her mantle. She won’t be able to question you on that. But she’ll know the truth that vases don’t come with lids, and that this may just be the urn she gets put in when the time comes.

Regular Price: $27.87 Price: $21.87 Buy / View on Amazon.com

9. Kitchen Organizer

We’ve already insulting her cooking, now we aim to insult her kitchen as a whole. An already organized kitchen wouldn’t benefit from a kitchen organizer. So hers must be a mess! Amazon has less nice organizers than this if you’re thinking you’d rather get this one for your own kitchen.

Regular Price: $32.00 Price: $22.99 Buy / View on Amazon.com

10. Death Wish Ground Coffee, The World's Strongest Coffee

This is the #1 best selling coffee on Amazon. And you can tell her that to make her feel good about the gift. But the implication based on the name of the coffee will be clear to you, even if it isn’t to her.

Price: $19.99 Buy / View on Amazon.com

11. Old Lives Matter Mug

And to go with coffee, you can get her this mug. Whether or not she appreciates the movement or appreciates this mug, you just got to call her old to her face, and that’s what really matters.

Currently
Unavailableon Amazon.com

Usually gifts put a smile on the recipient’s face, but this year the smile can be on yours (though you may have to keep it to yourself)

Just sit back and relax while we aggressively find the perfect gift for your mother-in-law.

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